Also, her closing call to action sounds more like a threat. You want to leave the reader with an avenue for follow-up, but don't intimidate them into responding. After all, they're not obligated to respond. You want to make them want to reach out to you for more information or next steps.
You want your closing statement to be the Mariano Rivera of letters of intent: a clean win, effective, and unambiguous. Don't overthink it! Basic, professional closings are the way to go.